Thoughts for November 14th, 2016

As I scroll through the statistics of who is actually reading and viewing my blog, I can make quite a few observations and conclusions. I can observe which posts and topics and subjects seem to attract the most views. I can observe and note which countries my viewers and readers come from. I can see how many times people read my articles and so on.

And I have learned something that feels rather disturbing. The highest number of views I have received relate to my post titled,  1 John 3:3 “Hope Purifies All”. In that post, I talk about the power of hope in Jesus, and Jesus’ hope for us as having a purifying effect on our spiritual lives. I talk about the inclusiveness of hope. I talk about my own sense of fear that I had wondering if there was place for me as a transgender woman in God’s plan.

When I found hope in Scripture and found hope in Jesus as my guide, I felt the need to really celebrate myself and celebrate the freedom of being my true and honest self. In that celebratory spirit, I told the story of my experiences with ballet and posted some photos of myself in leotards and tights.

And despite my better judgment, my concerns and fears were justified. It would seem many people I hoped and thought would be moved by my posts and messages seemed more interested in copying and saving my photos to satisfy their fetishes and sexual fascinations with transgender people, or cross-dressers, or pre-op male-to-females in tights and leotards. It seems the messages I have been trying to share to inspire people of the LGBT community may have been lost to those who simply see me as some kind of sexualized object of fascination. They are more interested in my ballet photos or just photos of people in leotards and spandex and tights than the messages of inspiration and hope and spiritual welcome that I share.

But rather than hide my photos or hide myself, I will continue to keep those photos available with the post so that genuinely interested people sincerely invested in my story can see the joy and happiness I have felt in being my true and honest self. I hope to continue to inspire others in the LGBT community to discover their spiritual paths and feel empowered to find their faith and claim it.

For those who wish to reduce me to some sort of sexual fetish or collect my photos for the purposes of sexual gratification, you may as well know that I do not appreciate this and will be very mindful of what photos I share on this ministry blog. I am a person, not pornography.

The bright side to this situation is that I can see many more sincere readers from so many countries across the world getting messages that do inspire and do move them. I hope that this humble blog ministry provides these sincere people with some positive message that sees them through their day, week, or month. I am hopeful that some scripture invites them to reflect on their own situations and provide some insights or answers or maybe just some added inspiration or encouragement. I have reached people in five continents now and in over fifty different countries (maybe even more than 50.)

I maintain this blog in my free time, and require no money or donations or contributions. I don’t ask that you be converted to some religion or some denomination. I don’t pass around a collection plate or force my beliefs on anyone. I simply invite folks to share this space and read what they like and contribute if they wish. I am glad to have attracted a following and glad that people of the LGBT community are coming out and finding something that brightens their spiritual experiences.



About Rachel Conlin McLeod

Transgender activist, Christian at First Baptist Church in Willimantic, Connecticut. B.A. in History and Social Sciences, B.A. in Sociology Freelance writer, tutor, research assistant Loves hockey, ballet, women's gymnastics, and Bible studies.
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